Author Topic: Issue 3 - Ninja Power! - Page 31 - Spoils  (Read 20513 times)

Adam Dravian

  • The Writer
  • Administrator
  • *****
  • Posts: 875
    • View Profile
Issue 3 - Ninja Power! - Page 31 - Spoils
« on: August 23, 2016, 12:12:48 AM »


This is another page that I originally wrote way too much dialogue for. My initial draft goes into more detail about Dean’s older sister Debbie. About how she’s a model who moved out to LA, where she’s now dating a famous movie director and getting some bit movie roles. But none of that’s very important, so it was cut.

So how does Trance know that SlatCorp Tower has machine gun wielding robots patrolling it? Because his dad, Doc Sheen, is a scientist who works for SlateCorp’s robotics research and development division.

Red

  • Neon Ninja
  • **
  • Posts: 68
    • View Profile
Re: Issue 3 - Ninja Power! - Page 31 - Spoils
« Reply #1 on: August 23, 2016, 07:52:59 AM »
Will he or won't he??? That's what Eddie is going to ponder???

How would this have turned out if Alex was with them?

Jessica Safron

  • The Artist
  • Administrator
  • *****
  • Posts: 112
    • View Profile
Re: Issue 3 - Ninja Power! - Page 31 - Spoils
« Reply #2 on: August 23, 2016, 12:00:14 PM »
How would this have turned out if Alex was with them?

Good question! I'm wondering the same thing now, too.

Adam Dravian

  • The Writer
  • Administrator
  • *****
  • Posts: 875
    • View Profile
Re: Issue 3 - Ninja Power! - Page 31 - Spoils
« Reply #3 on: August 23, 2016, 08:01:23 PM »
How would this have turned out if Alex was with them?

Pretty differently. You could think of Alex and Sam as the proverbial angel and devil on Eddie's shoulders, but now the angel's MIA...

Jessica Safron

  • The Artist
  • Administrator
  • *****
  • Posts: 112
    • View Profile
Re: Issue 3 - Ninja Power! - Page 31 - Spoils
« Reply #4 on: August 23, 2016, 08:05:44 PM »
How would this have turned out if Alex was with them?

Pretty differently. You could think of Alex and Sam as the proverbial angel and devil on Eddie's shoulders, but now the angel's MIA...

Aw, I bet she's not as much of an angel as one would think!

Adam Dravian

  • The Writer
  • Administrator
  • *****
  • Posts: 875
    • View Profile
Re: Issue 3 - Ninja Power! - Page 31 - Spoils
« Reply #5 on: August 23, 2016, 08:13:35 PM »
How would this have turned out if Alex was with them?

Pretty differently. You could think of Alex and Sam as the proverbial angel and devil on Eddie's shoulders, but now the angel's MIA...

Aw, I bet she's not as much of an angel as one would think!

Right, Alex isn't a wet blanket, but she actually has a moral compass, where's Sam sold his for drugs and booze a long time ago.

Jessica Safron

  • The Artist
  • Administrator
  • *****
  • Posts: 112
    • View Profile
Re: Issue 3 - Ninja Power! - Page 31 - Spoils
« Reply #6 on: August 23, 2016, 08:21:33 PM »
How would this have turned out if Alex was with them?

Pretty differently. You could think of Alex and Sam as the proverbial angel and devil on Eddie's shoulders, but now the angel's MIA...

Aw, I bet she's not as much of an angel as one would think!

Right, Alex isn't a wet blanket, but she actually has a moral compass, where's Sam sold his for drugs and booze a long time ago.

Aw, I bet he has a compass!

Adam Dravian

  • The Writer
  • Administrator
  • *****
  • Posts: 875
    • View Profile
Re: Issue 3 - Ninja Power! - Page 31 - Spoils
« Reply #7 on: August 23, 2016, 08:25:37 PM »
How would this have turned out if Alex was with them?

Pretty differently. You could think of Alex and Sam as the proverbial angel and devil on Eddie's shoulders, but now the angel's MIA...

Aw, I bet she's not as much of an angel as one would think!

Right, Alex isn't a wet blanket, but she actually has a moral compass, where's Sam sold his for drugs and booze a long time ago.

Aw, I bet he has a compass!

Okay, fine. He has a compass, but he misplaced it during one of his blackout sessions.

Brianator

  • Neon Ninja
  • **
  • Posts: 68
    • View Profile
Re: Issue 3 - Ninja Power! - Page 31 - Spoils
« Reply #8 on: August 25, 2016, 11:26:13 AM »


This is another page that I originally wrote way too much dialogue for. My initial draft goes into more detail about Dean’s older sister Debbie. About how she’s a model who moved out to LA, where she’s now dating a famous movie director and getting some bit movie roles. But none of that’s very important, so it was cut.

So how does Trance know that SlatCorp Tower has machine gun wielding robots patrolling it? Because his dad, Doc Sheen, is a scientist who works for SlateCorp’s robotics research and development division.

If these robots with machine guns are anything like ED-209's then I would recommend using a Cobra Assault Cannon (It's state of the art, bang-bang!).  Heck, even if they weren't anything like ED-209's, it would still be a good idea.  I'm also guessing that Michael Slater's a cross between Dick Jones and Gordon Gekko.  Furthermore, I'm curious to see what Doc Sheen is like.  Is he going to be an arrogant jerk like Bob Morton or is he going to be a care-free eccentric guy like Doc Brown.  Or maybe he'll be a terse, socially awkward brainiac who takes his work very seriously like Egon Spengler?  Lastly, I hate to be a stickler but SlateCorp got misspelled the first time.
« Last Edit: August 26, 2016, 08:52:20 PM by Magnetron »
"My mind is aglow with whirling transient nodes of thought  careening through a cosmic vapour of invention."-Hedley Lamarr (Blazing Saddles)

Adam Dravian

  • The Writer
  • Administrator
  • *****
  • Posts: 875
    • View Profile
Re: Issue 3 - Ninja Power! - Page 31 - Spoils
« Reply #9 on: August 26, 2016, 08:58:26 PM »
If these robots with machine guns are anything like ED-209's then I would recommend using a Cobra Assault Cannon (It's state of the art, bang-bang!).  Heck, even if they weren't anything like ED-209's, it would still be a good idea.

Man, it's too bad Cobra Assault Cannons aren't more ninja-like, then Eddie might be able to simply magically summon one. Since you're familiar enough with RoboCop to quote "Red Forman's" character, I'm curious if you caught it when Ket used one of his quotes in Issue 2.

I'm also guessing that Michael Slater's a cross between Dick Jones and Gordon Gekko.  Furthermore, I'm curious to see what Doc Sheen is like.  Is he going to be an arrogant jerk like Bob Morton or is he going to be a charismatic eccentric guy like Doc Brown.

All good guesses...

Lastly, I hate to be a stickler but SlateCorp got misspelled the first time.

Are you referring to when I misspelled it in my previous forum post, or are you saying we misspelled it in the actual comic? I just double-checked this page and it looks right. I don't think we've mentioned SlateCorp in the comic prior to this page, have we?

Brianator

  • Neon Ninja
  • **
  • Posts: 68
    • View Profile
Re: Issue 3 - Ninja Power! - Page 31 - Spoils
« Reply #10 on: August 26, 2016, 11:15:25 PM »
Are you referring to when I misspelled it in my previous forum post, or are you saying we misspelled it in the actual comic? I just double-checked this page and it looks right. I don't think we've mentioned SlateCorp in the comic prior to this page, have we?

I'm actually referring to an earlier post you made on this page.  In it you wrote: "So how does Trance know that SlatCorp Tower has machine gun wielding robots patrolling it? Because his dad, Doc Sheen, is a scientist who works for SlateCorp’s robotics research and development division".  If you look closely you will notice that SlateCorp is misspelled as SlatCorp.  I mean, it's not that big of a deal really compared to some of the mistakes I've made, i.e. getting Viper and Razor mixed up and posting the wrong link to the song Push it to the Limit.
"My mind is aglow with whirling transient nodes of thought  careening through a cosmic vapour of invention."-Hedley Lamarr (Blazing Saddles)

Adam Dravian

  • The Writer
  • Administrator
  • *****
  • Posts: 875
    • View Profile
Re: Issue 3 - Ninja Power! - Page 31 - Spoils
« Reply #11 on: August 29, 2016, 02:52:46 AM »
Are you referring to when I misspelled it in my previous forum post, or are you saying we misspelled it in the actual comic? I just double-checked this page and it looks right. I don't think we've mentioned SlateCorp in the comic prior to this page, have we?

I'm actually referring to an earlier post you made on this page.  In it you wrote: "So how does Trance know that SlatCorp Tower has machine gun wielding robots patrolling it? Because his dad, Doc Sheen, is a scientist who works for SlateCorp’s robotics research and development division".  If you look closely you will notice that SlateCorp is misspelled as SlatCorp.  I mean, it's not that big of a deal really compared to some of the mistakes I've made, i.e. getting Viper and Razor mixed up and posting the wrong link to the song Push it to the Limit.

Gotcha. As long as the comic remains typo free, I'm not worried.

Rijst

  • Ninja Master
  • ****
  • Posts: 570
    • View Profile
Re: Issue 3 - Ninja Power! - Page 31 - Spoils
« Reply #12 on: August 29, 2016, 03:39:00 PM »
Did Sam cheekily get cooked up off-screen there? Great detail!
Quote from: "The Boy" (Bad-Ass Ninjas)
I read on the internet that ninjas are hungry, you want some food?

Adam Dravian

  • The Writer
  • Administrator
  • *****
  • Posts: 875
    • View Profile
Re: Issue 3 - Ninja Power! - Page 31 - Spoils
« Reply #13 on: August 29, 2016, 08:24:02 PM »
Did Sam cheekily get cooked up off-screen there? Great detail!

Hell yeah, the dude's an opportunist!

Red

  • Neon Ninja
  • **
  • Posts: 68
    • View Profile
Re: Issue 3 - Ninja Power! - Page 31 - Spoils
« Reply #14 on: September 06, 2016, 07:46:41 AM »
I think the REAL question should be..

Will Eddie go through with it or will he back out?