Issue 3 - Ninja Power! - Page 33 - Slater Mansion

[Adam Dravian]

You can't really tell on this page, but Eddie has unknowingly entered the house at Dean's bedroom. So of course he has a life-size statue of himself. Jessica considered having Eddie encounter a cardboard cutout of Dean instead, but I thought a statue would be funnier and better portray just how rich the Slaters are.

The statue is being back-lit by the only current light source in the room, which is coming from a TV.

Oh man, just wait'll you see what's playing on that TV...

Lately, our updates have been coming out waaay too slowly, and we're working to fix that. Right now is a super busy time for Jessica, as she's currently juggling several projects at once. But we've worked out a new schedule for her and that seems to be helping.

[Brianator]

First of all, I can't believe that Eddie's actually going to try and rob the Slater's mansion.  Also, I can't believe how easy it is for Eddie to get in.  Heck, he didn't even have to contend with guard dogs like the ninjas who tried to rob the Moore's mansion.  However, I wonder if Eddie will eventually encounter a muscular bodyguard.  As for what's playing on the TV, could it possibly be one of the Dean and Trish sex tapes?

[Adam Dravian]

First of all, I can't believe that Eddie's actually going to try and rob the Slater's mansion.  Also, I can't believe how easy it is for Eddie to get in.  Heck, he didn't even have to contend with guard dogs like the ninjas who tried to rob the Moore's mansion.

That's mostly due to us needing to move the story along at a faster pace so we can get to the plot point that ends this issue. The Slater mansion has a special type of security that Eddie sneaked past in the yard, but don't worry, you'll get to see when he encounters the same type of security in the house.

As for what's playing on the TV, could it possibly be one of the Dean and Trish sex tapes?

That's actually a great guess. You'll find out how close you are as soon as the next page goes live (hopefully sooner than in two weeks).

[Red]

I got a feeling that Eddie's career as a second story man will be short lived....!

[Rijst]

Jessica considered having Eddie encounter a cardboard cutout of Dean instead, but I thought a statue would be funnier and better portray just how rich the Slaters are.

I considered a life-size statue of myself once but because of my financial situation I had to make do with a cardboard cut out..

The suspense is building up on this page, not least because this is still Eddie and he tends to screw things up. Also it's not something he'd come up with himself, I wonder what he intends to do in there. Kind of like beating up the punks and then telling them to stop bullying people, I half expect him to do something stupid in the end.

[Adam Dravian]

I considered a life-size statue of myself once but because of my financial situation I had to make do with a cardboard cut out..

Haha, good to know that I'm not the only one.

The suspense is building up on this page, not least because this is still Eddie and he tends to screw things up.

As I was writing this page, it occurred to me that the comic medium doesn't lend itself well to tension-filled sneaking-type scenes. In a film, you can see the character creeping along, and then feel the suspense as they hide in the shadows as a security guard passes or whatever. And of course it's aided by suspenseful music and editing that helps build and maintain the suspense.

In a book, you can use descriptive prose to build suspense by talking about things like the sneaking character's heart hammering and sweat trickling down his sides as he slowly reaches for a doorknob, so nervous that he's holding his breath in anticipation...

But in a comic, you have to work with still images. You can't control how long the reader will linger on each panel, so that makes it really hard to build suspense for this type of scene. Not that it's impossible to have a suspenseful sneaking scene in a comic, but it's certainly not a strength of the medium.

Anyway, after giving this page a second look, some things jumped out at me that it's lacking, so it'll be getting a minor update sometime in the next couple days.

[Brianator]

As I was writing this page, it occurred to me that the comic medium doesn't lend itself well to tension-filled sneaking-type scenes. In a film, you can see the character creeping along, and then feel the suspense as they hide in the shadows as a security guard passes or whatever. And of course it's aided by suspenseful music and editing that helps build and maintain the suspense.

In a book, you can use descriptive prose to build suspense by talking about things like the sneaking character's heart hammering and sweat trickling down his sides as he slowly reaches for a doorknob, so nervous that he's holding his breath in anticipation...

But in a comic, you have to work with still images. You can't control how long the reader will linger on each panel, so that makes it really hard to build suspense for this type of scene. Not that it's impossible to have a suspenseful sneaking scene in a comic, but it's certainly not a strength of the medium.

Anyway, after giving this page a second look, some things jumped out at me that it's lacking, so it'll be getting a minor update sometime in the next couple days.

Couldn't you just use the narrator dude to describe how Eddie's feeling, or perhaps use a thought bubble?  As for suspenseful music, the reader could listen to one of the synth music tracks from the unofficial soundtrack or perhaps maybe something like the Mission Impossible theme song or if the person's feeling kinda silly, then perhaps something like Rock Lobster.

Another thing, the whole Eddie going into stealth mode and the exclamation point kinda reminds me of Metal Gear.  Who knows, maybe Eddie will end up sneaking around in a cardboard box or there'll be a guard that says, "I feel asleep" or something.

[Adam Dravian]

Couldn't you just use the narrator dude to describe how Eddie's feeling, or perhaps use a thought bubble?  As for suspenseful music, the reader could listen to one of the synth music tracks from the unofficial soundtrack or perhaps maybe something like the Mission Impossible theme song or if the person's feeling kinda silly, then perhaps something like Rock Lobster.

If we really wanted to bring out the suspense in this scene, we'd need to slow down the pace a bit, but like I said before, we need to reach the end point of the Issue before it gets too big to be printed as a standard comic issue. So Eddie breaking into the Slater mansion will be played more for comedy than suspense.

However, one of the changes that Jessica will be implementing to the page does bring back the Narrator Dude, as it seemed like a fitting time to use him. We haven't implemented the changes yet because Jessica's currently scrambling to finish art for some books that are coming out in October. She's just about done, then she'll be back to kicking ass on the comic.

Another thing, the whole Eddie going into stealth mode and the exclamation point kinda reminds me of Metal Gear.  Who knows, maybe Eddie will end up sneaking around in a cardboard box or there'll be a guard that says, "I feel asleep" or something.

Heheh, yeah. It's impossible for me to see an exclamation point appear over a character's head and not think of Metal Gear.

[Brianator]

If we really wanted to bring out the suspense in this scene, we'd need to slow down the pace a bit, but like I said before, we need to reach the end point of the Issue before it gets too big to be printed as a standard comic issue. So Eddie breaking into the Slater mansion will be played more for comedy than suspense.

Okay, so is it going to be anything like this scene from The Naked Gun?

However, one of the changes that Jessica will be implementing to the page does bring back the Narrator Dude, as it seemed like a fitting time to use him. We haven't implemented the changes yet because Jessica's currently scrambling to finish art for some books that are coming out in October. She's just about done, then she'll be back to kicking ass on the comic.

I assume that some of the artwork she's working on involves the book you're releasing, right?

[Adam Dravian]

Okay, so is it going to be anything like this scene from The Naked Gun?

Ha, nailed it! But seriously, I wonder how many panels it would take to accurately portray that scene, with all the fast-paced sight gags. Probably at least five pages worth. Unless the panels were really small, I guess.

I assume that some of the artwork she's working on involves the book you're releasing, right?

Yep, but first she's doing art for an upcoming novel by this dude named Mike Leon. His is the priority right now since he payed her with money and I only pay her in cuddles.

[Rijst]

Oh man you guys got me watching naked gun clips for an hour now..

[Adam Dravian]

Oh man you guys got me watching naked gun clips for an hour now..

Well that that point you might as well watch the whole movie.

I don't think I've ever watched any of the Naked Gun movies. At least not in their entirety. As far as those sort of farcical comedies go, Hot Shots! Part Deux was my favorite when I was in my early teens. Not sure how it'd hold up for me now. Of course, my current favorite farce comedy would be Kung Fury.

[Adam Dravian]

First of all, I can't believe that Eddie's actually going to try and rob the Slater's mansion.  Also, I can't believe how easy it is for Eddie to get in.  Heck, he didn't even have to contend with guard dogs like the ninjas who tried to rob the Moore's mansion.

That's mostly due to us needing to move the story along at a faster pace so we can get to the plot point that ends this issue. The Slater mansion has a special type of security that Eddie sneaked past in the yard, but don't worry, you'll get to see when he encounters the same type of security in the house.

Anyway, after giving this page a second look, some things jumped out at me that it's lacking, so it'll be getting a minor update sometime in the next couple days.

This page has now been updated, and we're a lot happier with it. Here's what's been added/changed:

• The Narrator Dude has busted back into the comic to set the scene for the page
• The balcony in the first panel has been totally redrawn in more detail (perhaps too much detail)
• Two patrolling security robots have been added to the yard
• Sam now has dialogue referencing Eddie sneaking past the robots
• Added a thought balloon to Eddie in the bottom-left panel, trying to justify his crimes (that panel was looking really weird to us without a thought balloon, so I typed up several options of what Eddie could be thinking, and let Jessica pick

We considered adding some thought balloons to the final panels. Maybe something like:

EDDIE (thought): Shit, it's Dean!
EDDIE (thought): Oh, just a statue.

But we think the art conveys what's going on well enough without balloons being tossed in and cluttering it up.

[EDIT: This is weird. No matter how many times I modify this post to remove the extra "/list" at the end, it keeps returning.][/list]