Author Topic: Issue 2 - Party Like It's 198X - Page 10 - Front Yard Confrontation  (Read 4340 times)

Adam Dravian

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Jessica and I waffled back and forth a bit about the idea of Alex “coming to Eddie’s rescue” on this page. On one hand, it seemed fitting, and we thought the idea of her flipping into the scene whirling nunchucks was funny. On the other hand, it’s the kind of thing that could easily be groan worthy. Hopefully, we pulled it off.
« Last Edit: March 03, 2015, 12:45:40 AM by Adam Dravian »

666threesixes666

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Re: Issue 2 - Party Like It's 198X - Page 10 - Riiip!
« Reply #1 on: August 17, 2014, 03:02:00 AM »
snacky fucking ROCKS!!!   ;D

aett

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Re: Issue 2 - Party Like It's 198X - Page 10 - Riiip!
« Reply #2 on: August 17, 2014, 07:40:43 PM »
Awesome, it's great to see the story continuing to move. Everyone's expressions are well-done on this page: the girls in panel 1, Snaky's concern in panel 5, a whole variety of mirth and shock in panel 6, Dean's complete lack of concern in panels 12 and 13, and Veronica's eyeroll in panel 13. By the way, I think Veronica is really starting to reveal her true personality at the very end there. Her level of grief (whether it's real or just something that she thinks she needs to express) being pushed aside so she can attend a party - and the whole "uh, DUH" attitude about whether she would even be attending - speaks volumes.

For what it's worth, Alex's martial arts skills fit perfectly for this All-Encompasing 80's Dimension and looks like it could have come straight out of a movie. A cheesy movie, probably, but it still fits the 80's style that you're going for.

Babe Alert: Nice dramatic angle in panel 1, and I appreciate the attention to details regarding Veronica crossing her arms in the last panel. And I'm surprised to see Alex's chest so clearly defined in her gi! I had figured that the vest outfit was chosen to help hide her figure (at least in-universe) until some kind of reveal, but then she could have wrapped up her breasts tightly in her gi if that were the case. Now I just think Eddie is a total moron for missing obvious hints (and subtle blushes) like in issue 1, page 7, panel 8! :)

Jessica Safron

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Re: Issue 2 - Party Like It's 198X - Page 10 - Riiip!
« Reply #3 on: August 17, 2014, 11:57:10 PM »
snacky fucking ROCKS!!!   ;D

Thanks. I love drawing Snacky so damn much.


Everyone's expressions are well-done on this page

Thanks. I love drawing expressive faces, too. I really like doing a page that shows a ton of varied emotions.

I noticed something odd right after exporting this page. I flipped between the previous page and this one in an image viewer and I noticed that, in almost the exact same spot on both pages, I drew Alex and Eddie with pretty much the same expression and hand gesture in the same direction from the same angle, both basically telling Dean to leave someone alone. I didn't intend that, hah.


And I'm surprised to see Alex's chest so clearly defined in her gi! I had figured that the vest outfit was chosen to help hide her figure (at least in-universe) until some kind of reveal, but then she could have wrapped up her breasts tightly in her gi if that were the case. Now I just think Eddie is a total moron for missing obvious hints (and subtle blushes) like in issue 1, page 7, panel 8! :)

Oh man, her chest does look way too defined in her gi! They were actually bothering me, mostly in panel 11, but I just tried not to worry about it and get the page done. But you're totally right: a gi simply wouldn't hang like that on her. I must have been in boob mode from drawing the other girls or something. That's such a mistake I made in my early teens, always making girls have these super defined boobs even when they're supposed to be wearing loose fitting clothes. This can go on the list of little fixes I should make before going to print, along with some weird mistakes with the tiny bounty hunter's costume a few pages back. As early readers, you guys are like our beta testers. Your payment is getting to have these odd early mistakes captured for you. Future readers won't get to see Alex's weirdly defined boobs on the site anymore.

Oh yeah, and not only do Alex's boobs look incorrect, but Adam actually told me a long long time ago that she'd probably tape her chest when doing karate stuff. I forgot about that.

Also, I see how that could look like blushing, but I believe it was just that weird lighting on her cheeks that everyone sort of had in that scene. Ooh, or maybe the super subtle blush I usually give to all the girls is showing up too strongly on your display. It's so minor on mine that I can't even remember if I gave it to her there, even looking at it.



Jessica and I waffled back and forth a bit about the idea of Alex “coming to Eddie’s rescue” on this page. On one hand, it seemed fitting, and we thought the idea of her flipping into the scene whirling nunchucks was funny. On the other hand, it’s the kind of thing that could easily be groan worthy. Hopefully, we pulled it off.

Alex to the rescue was Adam's idea, and I was against it at first. Then I thought about how it might be funny in a painfully lame sort of way. I felt like it was important to keep her from seeming too coolly sarcastic and smirky, like she was playfully being with Corey early in the issue. She's obviously upset here, which tragically makes it easier for someone to look foolish. Even if she's a capable fighter, she looks so goofy.

Michigander1911

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Re: Issue 2 - Party Like It's 198X - Page 10 - Riiip!
« Reply #4 on: August 18, 2014, 09:37:17 PM »
I was totally surprised to see Alex flipping into the page.  It's way over the top but I think it works well. 

Quote
Oh man, her chest does look way too defined in her gi! They were actually bothering me, mostly in panel 11, but I just tried not to worry about it and get the page done. But you're totally right: a gi simply wouldn't hang like that on her. I must have been in boob mode from drawing the other girls or something. That's such a mistake I made in my early teens, always making girls have these super defined boobs even when they're supposed to be wearing loose fitting clothes. This can go on the list of little fixes I should make before going to print, along with some weird mistakes with the tiny bounty hunter's costume a few pages back. As early readers, you guys are like our beta testers. Your payment is getting to have these odd early mistakes captured for you. Future readers won't get to see Alex's weirdly defined boobs on the site anymore.

I thought they were a little crazy too. You'll get it down.

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Adam Dravian

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Re: Issue 2 - Party Like It's 198X - Page 10 - Riiip!
« Reply #5 on: August 19, 2014, 08:23:32 AM »
Everyone's expressions are well-done on this page: the girls in panel 1, Snaky's concern in panel 5

But the question is: is Snacky concerned about Eddie falling, or is he merely concerned that Eddie is landing on one of the tasty ice cream cones?

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For what it's worth, Alex's martial arts skills fit perfectly for this All-Encompasing 80's Dimension and looks like it could have come straight out of a movie. A cheesy movie, probably, but it still fits the 80's style that you're going for.

I was totally surprised to see Alex flipping into the page.  It's way over the top but I think it works well.

To clarify what I meant about kung-fu Alex possibly being "groan-worthy," it's not the cheesy over-the-top factor that worried me. We're all about that kind of thing (though we aim to keep the comic at least somewhat grounded in reality, as opposed to something like Kung Fury [which I'm ultra pumped for, by the way]). What Jessica and I aren't fond of is when a girl in a movie or something does something "badass," and is all painfully sassy about it. It's extra cringe-inducing if she says the words "girl power" at any point. On the other hand, an example of a badass girl done well would be the Bride from Kill Bill.

Rijst

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Re: Issue 2 - Party Like It's 198X - Page 10 - Riiip!
« Reply #6 on: August 19, 2014, 12:04:45 PM »
Everyone's expressions are well-done on this page: the girls in panel 1, Snaky's concern in panel 5

But the question is: is Snacky concerned about Eddie falling, or is he merely concerned that Eddie is landing on one of the tasty ice cream cones?
He doesn't seem too bothered in panel 7 haha..

What Jessica and I aren't fond of is when a girl in a movie or something does something "badass," and is all painfully sassy about it. It's extra cringe-inducing if she says the words "girl power" at any point.

I hate that as well, although slightly less than young kids beating up adults after two karate lessons, or outsmart them in a stupid way (home alone style). Having said that, I do hope Alex pulls it off, Dean could be one of those whiners who starts crying after being sucker-punched in the face..
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Adam Dravian

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Re: Issue 2 - Party Like It's 198X - Page 10 - Riiip!
« Reply #7 on: August 30, 2014, 01:28:49 AM »
... and Alex's boobs have now been fixed.